I know people have my back, and it means so much.
I have so much love in my life. It’s crazy, but I don’t think I really understood what love is until now. I know I’ll have friends no matter what, and that knowledge in the face of all this scariness is uplifting and overwhelming at the same time. Every message or email means so much and I know that I will heal and be well and strong again because of them. I don’t think I can ever properly thank everyone who has sent me well wishes, and I’m afraid of any kind words going unacknowledged.
I have to thank my parents, and Ryan, and everyone who listens to me ramble every week, and everyone who knew me when I was a kid and endured my weirdness and still likes me anyway. I don’t know how people lived through cancer before communication technology. If I had to face this alone, I don’t think I could survive.
I go into surgery tomorrow. I don’t think I’ve ever been more scared, but I am so hopeful.